We can’t make this stuff up. Orginal Van Halen singer David Lee Roth put out a video on his YouTube Channel called “The Ballad of Popsicle Sam.” Now the video is really just a bunch of random photos of Dave and audio of him going off on Sammy Hagar and explaining that he was sex probed by aliens. He said that aliens tapped into his brain using a Wi-Fi connection.
“I know [that] when you’re abducted by aliens, you get sex probed,” Roth continued. “I am compelled to solicit this sordid subject in an effort to explain Sam Hagar’s conduct. For the last 10 summers, I haven’t said a single syllable about him. Not one. I defy you. And in the face of a constant fart gas aimed in our direction here at the Mojo Dojo Diamond Dave Laboratories. And I think we’ve arrived at both the technical and the medical answer that may explain some of Sammy Hagar’s conduct and his constant spew of diarrhea vitriol in our direction. Sammy Hagar was abducted by aliens and he was sex probed. Sex probed.”
