YOU MIGHT HAVE A BAD LANDLORD.

If there are as many holes in the walls as there are in your landlord excuses for not fixing them…you might have a bad landlord.

If the only running water you’ve had for months is the water that was running through your living room during last month’s flooding …you might have a bad landlord.

If by "pet friendly", he means the apartment has so many mice your cats will never go hungry…you might have a bad landlord.

If he agrees to knock ten bucks off the rent each month if you let him watch you potty…you might have a bad landlord.

If the closest thing the apartment has to a smoke alarm is that in the event of a fire, you’ll probably be awaken by the sound of the rats coughing…you might have a bad landlord.

If he blames the funny smell of decay coming from the crawlspace on your insistence on getting the furnace fixed…you might have a bad landlord.

If Paul McCartney’s former wives have fewer combined legs than all the furniture in the living room…you might have a bad landlord.

And if the closest thing your apartment has had to a fresh coat of paint, is the chalk body outline on the living room floor…you definitely have a bad landlord.